Cake Love Boxed Set: All Things Payne
by Elizabeth Lynx
Cake Love #1-2
Publication Date: November 19, 2015
Genres: Adult, Boxed Set, Contemporary, Humor, Romance
Buy (#FREE for #KindleUnlimited subscribers!): Amazon • Amazon UK • Amazon CA • Amazon AU
Synopsis: Now you can have your cake and eat it too!
All the hot and crazy antics of Morgana Drake and Henrik Payne in one sexy boxed set. Seriously, look at the cover, there is cake right on it. And it’s sitting on her butt, what is sexier than that!
This story! That’s what’s sexier. So, sit back, relax and enjoy the ins and outs, ups and downs of all things Payne.
What do you get with this SUPER-FANTASTIC Cake Love Boxed Set: All Things Payne? I’ll tell you:
RULES OF PAYNE –
***WARNING – Steamy Sex Scenes – Cake addiction – Incorrect usage of the word Potatoes***
Morgana Drake has some problems in her life. She has a boss she hates but can’t stop fantasizing about him. As she puts her focus into getting into the company’s Executive Development Program she finds only one thing standing in her way, you guessed it – her boss, Henrik Payne.
Henrik Payne is very serious about his job. He has worked hard for over ten years to become VP of Sales and Marketing and make Mimir the third largest online retailer. He has rules he follows to make sure the company and his life run smoothly.
So, why does he keep breaking all his rules?
RULES OF PAYNE 2: Electric Boogaloo –
***WARNING – More Steamy Sex Scenes – Mile High sex that can’t be unread and Dirty Condom Wrappers used as lucky charms***
Morgana Drake has had a taste of Payne and finds she likes it in more ways than one, but she still has a few problems.
Henrik Payne knows what he has to do. In the process he realizes he is too selfish for his own good, and the good of others. He’s also discovers his rules suck balls. He has made a new list.
Henrik and Morgana have gotten caught. Now what?
Do they get fired? Do they stay together? Where does cake fall in all of this? Read this and find out!
THE PAYNE IN THE BLOG –
You have now read the Rules of Payne and Rules of Payne 2 and find an unusual craving for cake? It happens. But you also find out you want so much more. Things that were referenced in the Rules of Payne books, you have to know how it all went down. Well, you are in luck! Get the ‘behind the scenes’ so to speak with this collection of character blog posts. The very first post being the moment Morgana and Henrik first met!
The posts lead directly up to where the book begins. Here’s what Morgana has to say about it:
***WARNING – Real Blog Posts – Sex Scenes – Copious amounts of Cake***
I love cake. Wait, wait, let me start again…. My Boss is an a**hole but mind numbingly gorgeous. That didn’t sound right either. Scratch this (note to author – do not put this in the blurb).
My name is Morgana Drake, I write a blog. You may have heard of it, The Payne in the Blog (same as the title of this book, clever huh!). No? Oh well — you will trust me! I may just be Mr. Henrik Payne’s assistant now, but soon I will be running the company.
How do I know? I can feel it in my bones. There is only one problem, my boss. They don’t just call him the Payne for nothing. He’s a jerk and I hate him! Then why do I keep fantasizing about him? Seriously, I think I need help.
About Elizabeth Lynx
Elizabeth Lynx is not a robot, that’s for sure. At least she says she’s not. She is also not a space alien. How do I know this, because she was born in Baltimore Maryland in the 1970’s when no one wanted to be in Baltimore Maryland so why would her parents say that if it weren’t true. Of course she has had her suspicions growing up and is still in a continual search for evidence that backs up her space age theories.
To bide her time she writes about ‘normal’ people and their sexy romantic lives. Her husband chooses to put up with her theories and paranoid musings. Her two little boys help her see that perhaps she isn’t an alien but more of a climbing rock. This theory is new, so she needs more time to develop it further.
EXCERPTS: Cake Love: All Things Payne by Elizabeth Lynx
EXCERPT: Rules of Payne 2
I look back to where Henrik and Ms. Slut were and now they’re gone. My eyes dart around and I see them crossing the street and heading straight toward us. He hasn’t seen me and I wonder if maybe I should hide and then follow him. He followed me in New York, so now I can do the same to him. Find out if he is with her or if they just work together.
I quickly dash behind a parked car beside the curb as Aria watches me. She nods in acknowledgement and runs back inside the sandwich shop as she watches through the glass window. I gasp as the car starts and exhaust fumes blast into my face. I have to close my eyes as I gag and cough. Then the car pulls away.
“Morgana?” Henrik’s deep voice calls over to me, and I look up to see him tilting his head with the blonde at his side.
I look frantically down on the ground and see a dirty wrapper, which I quickly grab as I stand.
“There it is.” I shake my head and chuckle as I walk over to Henrik. I raise the shiny metallic paper in my hand letting them know I found what I was apparently searching for.
“Fell out of my hand. Thought I lost my lucky…” I examine it closely and discover it’s a condom wrapper. Closing my eyes and taking a deep breath before I open them to see Henrik as he tries to cover a laugh.
“Your lucky what, Morgana?” His shoulders are shaking and his hand is now covering his mouth.
“Condom wrapper! My lucky condom wrapper. I mean, come on, doesn’t everyone have a lucky something? If you think about it, what is worse, a lucky rabbit’s foot, which is morbid by the way, or the wrapper from the condom you lost your virginity to?” I raise my brows and nod as if this makes total sense. But as I hear myself, I realize how disgusting I sound. When I glance over at the blonde who is now looking at me like I have the bubonic plague, my suspicions are confirmed: I am revolting.
I drop the wrapper and wipe my hand on my jeans.
“Your lucky wrapper is blowing away Morgana!” Henrik pretends like he is trying to catch it.
“Shut up.” I say as I fold my arms over my chest.
EXCERPT: The Payne In The Blog
I hear a deep guttural snore vibrate from between my thighs. What the hell? I start to push at him but he is quite heavy. Finally I manage to squirm out of from under him.
He fucking passed out! Oh my god!
I push my dress back down and stand to figure out what to do. He is face down in the cushions of the couch and I know if he throws up he’ll suffocate. Crap, I have to move him.
“Brain? Oh Brain? I need some help here.” I whisper to myself. I can sense the glare from my Brain, it’s not happy.
“Oh NOW you want me to help you. I seem to recall telling you not to do this, but NOOO you had to get your groove on.” My Brain folds its imaginary squiggly arms at me and huffs.
“Brain, stop being an ass and just help me!”
“Hey, don’t get me involved.” My Butt calls out.
“Fine, you want my help; get him lying on his side on the couch. That way if he pukes it will fall to the floor. You also might want to stay with him for a while to make sure he doesn’t vomit or roll over onto his back.”
I roll my eyes at the task at hand. First I try wrapping my arms around his chest and lift. He doesn’t even move an inch. The man must weight like 500 pounds because I almost broke my back with that move. I may have a bit a muscle on me…alright it is fat that I pass off as muscle, but Mr. Payne is too much for my 5’6″ frame.
Standing back and assessing the situation I figure he is already partly on the couch, so if I can just push his bottom half on it should be good.
With all my might and my shoulder, I push Mr. Payne onto the couch and roll him on his side. Stepping away to admire my work I realize how sweet he looks asleep. His brow isn’t creased in a constant scowl like normal. Mr. Payne’s relaxed face is sexy and cute at the same time.
A thought pops into my head. A very dirty thought.
“Don’t you even think about that Morgana!” My Brain starts its warning.
I ignore her and kneel down next to him. Very carefully I unbutton his pants and pull down the zipper. Looking back at Mr. Payne I see he is still sound asleep. There is a thrill that races through me. The excitement of getting caught and of looking at the forbidden.
My smile grows as I push past his briefs and tug it out. It’s thick and still semi hard. My thumb follows the veins to the tip as my fingers play. It’s growing in my hand and my eyes take it all in as if this is some new found discovery leading to the cure for cancer.
Instantly my excitement turns to fear as I hear voices coming from outside. Quickly I shove his member back into his pants and zip him up in haste. Due to my recklessness with his pants and parts, the zipper catches on something. From the way Mr. Payne shoots up off the couch I suspect I know what the zipper caught on.
“Aaaa! What the fuck!” He screams while fumbling with his fly and staring at it in shock.
My heart is pounding now and I am whisper screaming in my head for my Brain. All she says to me before I watch her speed off in the Ferrari, “You stupid bitch!”
2 thoughts on “Blog Tour ** Excerpts ** Giveaway : Cake Love Boxed Set: All Things Payne by Elizabeth Lynx”
Thank you. This looks great!
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